i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
he laminated a picture of his dick.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Randomize
