am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Randomize
