i just had sex bonerless
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
