he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
