she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
