After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
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