Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
