NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Randomize
