Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
Randomize
