That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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