I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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