I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
