Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
organizing the empties. That sober.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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