we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize
