hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Randomize
