That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
