is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize