Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
