He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
