You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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