Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
My dick has a subreddit
Randomize
