I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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