We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Randomize
