yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize
