I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Randomize
