Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
