I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Randomize
