Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
