PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
