there was a trapeze. enough said
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
