the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
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