he wants to bone in the snuggie
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize