dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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