I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
