theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
There's always time for handjobs
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize