WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
