I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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