i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
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