there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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