So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
His hands were made for my vagina.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I'm both gender and math confused
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
