Plan B is the new Plan A
Girls should come with a carfax report
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Randomize
