I wannas sexs uuuuu
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize
