i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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