And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize
