I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
