the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Randomize
