She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
My balls are so social today.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
