How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
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