Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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