Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
