Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
